You Don’t Have to Do It All: How to Set Boundaries and Find More Joy in Your Busy Life
I used to believe that if I just worked a little harder, planned a little better, and pushed through the exhaustion, I could do it all. I thought that being a great parent meant showing up 100% at home while also excelling in my career. I convinced myself that if I wasn’t handling everything—work, kids, meals, household responsibilities, friendships—then I was somehow failing.
But the truth? Trying to do it all was the very thing that was draining me.
If you’re nodding along, feeling stretched too thin, constantly saying yes even when you’re running on empty, I see you. I’ve been there. And I want you to know: you don’t have to do it all. In fact, trying to do everything only keeps you from what matters most.
So how do we break free from the pressure to be “everything to everyone”? The answer starts with boundaries.
Step 1: Recognize the Cost of Doing It All
When we take on too much—whether out of guilt, pressure, or the belief that no one else can do it as well as we can—we end up sacrificing our own well-being.
• We say yes to the extra project at work, even though it means missing bedtime stories.
• We volunteer for school events, even when our schedule is already maxed out.
• We handle every household responsibility ourselves instead of asking for help.
And the result? We end up exhausted, irritable, and disconnected from the very people we’re trying to be there for.
Here’s the hard truth: Saying yes to everything means saying no to yourself. And you matter too.
Step 2: Redefine What Success Looks Like
Many of us grew up believing that success meant working harder, achieving more, and never letting anyone down. But that version of success often leads to burnout.
What if success, instead, looked like:
• Feeling present with your kids without the weight of unfinished work hanging over you?
• Having time to take care of yourself—without guilt?
• Letting go of perfectionism and embracing good enough?
The reality is, you get to decide what success means for you. It doesn’t have to look like being busy 24/7. It can look like ease, balance, and joy.
Step 3: Set (and Keep) Boundaries Without Guilt
One of the most powerful ways to reclaim your time and energy is by setting clear boundaries. And I get it—boundaries can feel uncomfortable at first. It might feel like you’re letting people down. But in reality, you’re simply protecting your energy so you can show up fully for what truly matters.
Guilt was (and still is) one of the hardest things for me. Setting boundaries felt selfish at first—like I was failing the people who depended on me. But then I came across Mel Robbins’ Let Them theory, and it completely shifted my perspective.
She says:
“Let them think what they want. Let them be disappointed. Let them react however they’re going to react—and then let yourself decide what to do with it.”
That was huge for me. I started realizing that I don’t have to control how others feel about my boundaries—I just have to hold them. I can let them be frustrated, let them have their opinions, and let myself let go of the guilt.
Here’s how you can start setting boundaries, guilt-free:
1. Identify where you need boundaries.
• Is it work bleeding into family time?
• Is it saying yes to too many social obligations?
• Is it handling too many household responsibilities without help?
2. Communicate your boundaries clearly.
• “I won’t be checking emails after 6 PM.”
• “I’m not available for calls on weekends.”
• “I need 30 minutes of uninterrupted time in the mornings.”
3. Hold the line.
• People may push back at first, but stick to your boundaries. Over time, they’ll respect them—and you’ll feel the difference.
Here’s what I learned: When you set boundaries, you don’t push people away—you teach them how to respect your time and energy.
Step 4: Give Yourself Permission to Let Go
The pressure to “do it all” is often self-imposed. We think we should be able to handle everything, but who said we have to?
• It’s okay to leave dishes in the sink overnight.
• It’s okay to decline an invitation if you’re feeling drained.
• It’s okay to order takeout instead of cooking dinner.
Letting go doesn’t mean you don’t care—it means you’re prioritizing what truly matters.
Step 5: Get the Support You Deserve
Breaking free from the pressure to do it all isn’t easy—but you don’t have to do it alone.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, or stuck in the cycle of overcommitment, coaching can help you create the balance you deserve. Together, we’ll identify where you’re overextending yourself, redefine what success looks like for you, and build a life that gives you more joy, ease, and fulfillment.
If this resonates with you, I invite you to book a free chemistry call. Let’s talk about where you are, where you want to be, and how we can get you there—without burnout, guilt, or overwhelm.
Your well-being matters. Let’s make it a priority.
